Self- Introduction Letter
Dear Professor Blackstone,
My name is Joey, a Year 1 Mechanical Engineering student at the Singapore Institute of Technology (SIT). In 2021, I graduated from Ngee Ann Polytechnic (NP) with a Diploma in Mechanical Engineering, specializing in Automotive Sports.
My mother fueled my profound interest in cars as she enjoyed customizing her ride. It was always a delight to accompany her to workshops and observe the skilled mechanics at work. Coupled with my fascination with the mechanics of Formula One cars, I was determined to pursue a career in the automotive industry.
During my Final Year Project in NP, my team and I had the unique opportunity to work with a classic car workshop to restore a 1975 Lincoln Continental. An interesting trivia, both President John F. Kennedy and Elvis Presley owned similar models, albeit from different production years.
Unlike modern cars equipped with the technology to plug in an Onboard Diagnostic (OBD) for a quick diagnosis, we heavily relied on old repair manuals of similar engines and guidance from the experienced mechanics to manually test each system. My team entrusted me with the restoration of the main engine and fuel systems. It demanded much grit, determination and accidental ingestion of corroded metals, but when the once-seized engine finally roared to life after 20 years, every ounce of effort proved worthwhile.
This memorable experience gave me valuable insights to my proficiency in technical work and my unwavering passion for the automotive field. It further cemented my decision to pursue Mechanical Engineering in University.
An introvert, I shy away from initiating conversations and addressing large crowds. However, in the company of friends and family, I transform into a chatterbox. My primary weakness is my lack of confidence in maintaining eye contact. It is daunting for me to look into their eyes as I often find myself subconsciously drawn into their obsidian orbs of abyss which renders my mind a blank slate and it hinders my ability to form sentences.
My goal for this module is to overcome my fear of maintaining eye contact and refine my skills to be an eloquent and articulated speaker. With your expert guidance, I am confident to master the art of effective communication.
Yours sincerely,
Joey
My name is Joey, a Year 1 Mechanical Engineering student at the Singapore Institute of Technology (SIT). In 2021, I graduated from Ngee Ann Polytechnic (NP) with a Diploma in Mechanical Engineering, specializing in Automotive Sports.
My mother fueled my profound interest in cars as she enjoyed customizing her ride. It was always a delight to accompany her to workshops and observe the skilled mechanics at work. Coupled with my fascination with the mechanics of Formula One cars, I was determined to pursue a career in the automotive industry.
During my Final Year Project in NP, my team and I had the unique opportunity to work with a classic car workshop to restore a 1975 Lincoln Continental. An interesting trivia, both President John F. Kennedy and Elvis Presley owned similar models, albeit from different production years.
Unlike modern cars equipped with the technology to plug in an Onboard Diagnostic (OBD) for a quick diagnosis, we heavily relied on old repair manuals of similar engines and guidance from the experienced mechanics to manually test each system. My team entrusted me with the restoration of the main engine and fuel systems. It demanded much grit, determination and accidental ingestion of corroded metals, but when the once-seized engine finally roared to life after 20 years, every ounce of effort proved worthwhile.
This memorable experience gave me valuable insights to my proficiency in technical work and my unwavering passion for the automotive field. It further cemented my decision to pursue Mechanical Engineering in University.
An introvert, I shy away from initiating conversations and addressing large crowds. However, in the company of friends and family, I transform into a chatterbox. My primary weakness is my lack of confidence in maintaining eye contact. It is daunting for me to look into their eyes as I often find myself subconsciously drawn into their obsidian orbs of abyss which renders my mind a blank slate and it hinders my ability to form sentences.
My goal for this module is to overcome my fear of maintaining eye contact and refine my skills to be an eloquent and articulated speaker. With your expert guidance, I am confident to master the art of effective communication.
Yours sincerely,
Joey
Hi Joey! Very well written self introduction. The usage of profound words, links to your interest and organisation of the paragraphing made the email exciting to read. However, too much details regarding your internship made the email marginally exceed the word limit and, the second last paragraph when you started with "An introvert" was a little abrupt. Overall, a very interesting introduction, solid work!
ReplyDeleteHi Ben! Thanks for reading and providing feedback. Appreciate it:)
DeleteHello Joey. What a great read for an introduction! The language and structure of your email made it an enjoyable and easy read. However, as Ben has mentioned, there are slightly too much details on your your internship that made you slightly exceed the word limit. Also, there could have been a better way to start off the second last paragraph as starting so abruptly will cause the reader to lose momentum while reading the letter.
ReplyDeleteHey Timothy! Thanks for reading and providing feedback. Appreciate it:)
DeleteHello Joey. I really enjoyed reading your self introduction. I think that your self introduction starts of really strong but ends poorly. The transition to your communication weakness feels abrupt especially opening with "An introvert", this kills the flow. I also think that there is no indication of a communication strength, you can remove extra stuff like the trivia in exchange for space to indicate your communication strength.
ReplyDeleteHello Jiale! Thanks for reading and providing feedback. Appreciate it:)
DeleteThis is an amazing letter, Joey. Who would guess when first meeting you that you have such an interest with classic cars, such a family background (and a mom with a serious ride, it seems) and such an appropriate poly work experience!
ReplyDeleteI want to hear more abiout this!
Yo've provided other details in this letter that stimulate your readers' interests. I can see similar amazement in the responses of your classmates.
I want to hear more from you in class, because as is now obvious, you are a very special person.
Starting this coming week, I challenge you to be more vocal. I look forward to that.
Brad